Monday, April 22, 2013

Giving Each Phillies Player a Terrible Nickname

    Currently I have an hour to kill and I wouldn't be a good college student if I chose to spend it doing homework.  So, instead I will come up with some terrible nicknames for the Phillies players.  Hold on to your seats because here it goes, make suggestions in the comments or on Twitter: @BroadStBeat:

                                      Actual Nickname:                               My Nickname for him: 
Jimmy Rollins-                   "J-Roll"                "Infield Fly" "Jimmy Popup"(Courtesy of @msankey86)
Freddy Galvis-                                                                           "Freddy Fantastic"
Chase Utley-                    "The Man"                                              "Our Savior"
Ryan Howard-               "The Big Piece"                                         "The Shift"
Michael Young-                                                  "Michael Forever Young"(Courtesy of @NotWheeler)
Dom Brown-              "Downtown Dom Brown"                    "What Can Brown Do For You?"
Ben Revere-                                                                      "The Hits are Coming, The Hits are Coming"
John Mayberry Jr.-                                                                       "Can't Play-Berry"
Laynce Nix-                                                                                     "Sir Nix Alot"
Erik Kratz-                      "TurkeyPig"                                "The Kratz Meow""The Kratz Pajama's"
Carlos Ruiz-                    "Chooch"                                                 "Senor Octubre"
Delmon Young-                                            "Delmon Sure-As-Hell-Doesn't- Move-Like-He's Young"
Kevin Frandsen-                                                                  "Just Let Him Pinch-Hit Already Charlie!"
Humberto Quintero-                                                                     "The Bench Warmer"
Ezequiel Carrera-                                                                                    "Who?"
Cole Hamels-                  "Hollywood"                                              "Cy Hamels"
Roy Halladay-                    "Doc"                                                 "Happy Halladay's"
Cliff Lee-                                                                                       "The Cliff Hanger"
Kyle Kendrick-                                                               "Kyle Kendrick(Good)" "Lyle Kendrick(Bad)"
John Lannan-                                                                              "The Platypus" "Despicable Me"
Jonathan Pettibone-                                                                              "Bonesaw"
Jonathan Papelbon-        "Cinco-Ocho"                                            "Mr. Leadership Himself"
Mike Adams-                                                                                       "Old Faithful"
Jeremy Horst-                                                                  "A Horst is a Horst of Course, of Course"
Antonio Bastardo-                                                          "The Big Bastardo" "Bubble-butt Bastardo"
Chad Durbin-                                 "Ex Lax" "Damned if you do Durbin"(Courtesy of @matthewj0hn) 
Raul Valdes-                                                                                      "Well This Ones Over"
Phillippe Aumont-                                                                           "The Canadian Crusher"

    There you have them, my terrible attempt at giving every Phillies player a nickname.  If you've made it to this point of the article congratulations, give yourself a pat on the back, you've earned it! Don't forget to send us your suggestions!

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